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Writer's pictureBirgit Kersting

How does Happiness work...?


Dear blog friends,


I am currently studying the characteristics and messages of emotions. I ask myself "how do we actually use our emotions"?

Are they our teachers, do we follow their direction? Do they make us aware of a grievance in our lives, or do we look deeper? Do emotions transport a message that could bring us closer to our true purpose in life? Or do they simply serve as a description for feeling states?


I've been doing some research and am getting to know emotions better. So far, I've actually understood them as mere labels for mood states, words that express how I'm feeling inside. Generally, emotions are not wanted in our culture and we are drilled to get rid of them as quickly as possible as if they were nuisances.

There are some that are still somewhat acceptable (sadness, for example) but others we do not want to see anywhere near us. Anger, fear, envy, and above all shame. Away with it!!!


When emotions cannot find a nice place in our life, when they are not allowed to flow around us, we stagnate inside. Emotions - we have learned - are either expressed excessively and explosively (aggression and conflicts) or they are suppressed and creep around as dark fields in our subconscious (all scales of fear). There we try to freeze them. We don't want to know anything about them.


Yet emotions want to be our messengers. They want to make us aware of something that is in trouble in the realm of our soul and that we could easily rectify. To do that we have to learn to respect them as transmitters. Every single emotion has its specific function.


Of the many emotions on my study list, I'm singling out Happiness today.


The Tao Te-Ching (the book of the Meaning of life) calls Happiness the most dangerous of all emotions, not by itself, but because of the way we deal with it. We chase it, we sell our souls for it, we try to nestle ourselves in its territory, completely regardless of whether this emotion - Happiness- is precisely the one that will lead us forward.*


Like all other emotions, happiness is only helpful if we let it flow. It can't be grasped, and when we try anyway, we often end up in the clutches of toxic distractions: too much food, too much alcohol, and drugs. When we try to hold on to the feeling of happiness, our lives get off-axis. And because of our desperate desire for happiness, we become joyless.


Like any other emotion, happiness has a unique energy that connects with all others in a wonderfully supportive way to get something moving again in our lives. Happiness is about curiosity, about searching for something, and at the same time it has the characteristic of a childlike openness.


Happiness is not the opposite of other emotions. They are all a team.


If you want to have more happiness in your life, pay attention to the stories you tell. Especially the ones you tell yourself. Does the so-called happy ending really mean happiness to you?

Happiness is an inner celebration. Celebrate with it and then let the feeling move on. It is a moment on your way. A great impulse, a gift. Such impulses are - by the way - completely independent of what others do or don't do. Happiness is not the fulfillment of an expectation (a story)!

Moments of deep happiness always come as a surprise. It is your soul that brings them forth.

And they will always return if you allow inner movement. Happiness is not an end goal! The key to happiness is F L O W.


Happiness is not in any way predictable. You may set a goal and even achieve it, but happiness is not the destination. It cannot be captured, cannot be bribed, or earned.

If it is suddenly there, celebrate it! Don't ask. You are in the right place at the right time and you have heard the message. Celebrate yourself!


Before I sign off for today, allow me to remind you that happiness can only come into your life when all other emotions are flowing freely. If you experience continuous ack of happiness, then let's see if any of your other emotions are blocked.


I wish you all the best, let it flow....


Birgit


*I took this passage from the book "Language of Emotions", by Karla McLaren, https:/karlamclaren.com.




Translated with www.DeepL.com/Translator

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